Tokyo, Japan
18th temple
Tom tried to wake me up at 3:36 but I hid under the covers until 5 and he ignored me.
Another bleak day for me. I'm not sure what it is. I am no longer happy here in Vernon. I miss my family.
On our trip to Dollar General to get cat food I barely said a word. I am not very pleasant to be around. James knows I am struggling. He wants to help and is very sweet about it, but he doesn't really know how.
I know the Savior loves me but for some reason I am not feeling that love like I want to. One positive thing I am doing since Sunday is spending the first hour I get up with the Lord, praying and studying the scriptures. I have always prayed and read my scriptures but not always the first thing when I get up. It is something I am doing to put the Lord first in my life.
I am struggling with preparing for my lesson. The word judge has a negative connotation even though Moroni calls the Final Judgment coming before "the pleasing bar of God." The lesson is entitled, "They Are Their Own Judges". I am afraid of my own judgment more than I am the Lord's.
"We have been instructed by prophets past and prophets present - and by the pattern set by our Savior - how to minister."
- Elder William K. Jackson
Genesis 46:3
And he sai, I am God, the God of thy father: fear not to go down into Egypt; for I will there make of thee a great nation:
in senseless wars. Such a tragedy.
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